I washed my hair in the kitchen sink as soon as I got home from work. I had nowhere to be so it wasn’t for appearances sake; I simply couldn’t stand the look of myself. Taking a shower was too much work, what with taking my clothes off and all. I simply wanted to feel refreshed and cleansed without the effort.
Afterwards, I immediately felt more beautiful. There’s been no one home to affirm this, but that is not the point. I just needed to be more comfortable for myself.
I think the weight of my bad hair day was a metaphor for my state of being this week. The roller coaster of inner emotions, simmering thoughts and reminders of past hurts and anger showed up in my tresses!
I have been told that this is all part of the grieving process and of letting go- especially the part about being angry. So what to do, what to do. Not much action is necessary, I think. I’ll sit with it for a while, but not wallow in it. I’ll stay quiet. Offer it up to the universe. And breath in. Breathe out.
3 thoughts on “Holding On and Letting Go”
I’m not sure what you’re referring to here but I hope you are ok. All the best – I’m guessing you are talking about old hurts and that your future plans are still intact. I hope so.
All is well. The reality of change is upon us here. While it is overwhelmingly positive, the realization of saying goodbye is bittersweet. At times, reminders of the past abuse will come knocking. I am learning that this is normal! Lots of yoga and meditation keep my heart in check. 🙂
Yes it is weird how past troubles come back to haunt us. I think you are taking the right path in focusing on yoga and meditation – also looking forward as much as possible rather than back. Healing can be a long journey sometimes but putting lots of new and wonderful memories in place can shake loose the old bad bits. Take care. 🙂