Earlier this week, artist extraordinaire and fellow blogger, Sharon Cummings (sharoncummings) posed a question for her followers. At the end of her post, she asked “What is your saving grace?” (http://sharoncummings.wordpress.com/2014/05/20/my-saving-g-r-a-c-e/)
The question certainly intrigued me and inspired me to think about what mine might be. Or maybe help me to further define what Grace means to me. I wrote about Grace in a different context last January ( A State of Grace). While I believe that message stills holds true for me today, I also believe that Grace is a multifaceted state of being. In fact, I thinks it is a huge part of yourself that defines your essence and helps you to survive.
I know that I lost my Grace over time during the course of my first marriage. The insidiousness of verbal and emotional abuse eats away at your identity and stops the clock on what makes you tick until you feel hollow inside. It was only during my divorce proceedings (and the endless post divorce shenanigans on his part) that I began to redevelop my inner Grace.
I recall a moment in July of 2008 when my soon to be ex-husband told me “I hope you scratch, crawl and suffer.” These words were a match that lit my fire. It was clear that he was determined to undermine me financially and emotionally. I was not going to let that happen. The course of events that unfolded over the next few years were tests of my ability to withstand hardship and to stand up for what I believed was right for my own life as well as my sons’. It was by no means easy. When I felt myself about to fall off the edge, I would remember the words that my mother said to me, “Don’t let him break you.”
My saving grace is my tenacity. The positive stubbornness which provides the seeds for stamina and strength. The bold determination to carve out a life for myself. The confidence that I can and will solve problems and make decisions that empower me. And the faith that all will be well no matter what.